Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
