your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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