Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
