I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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