only if we run a train.
done.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
i dont even know how to be here
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Randomize
