he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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