This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
