Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
