I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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