i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
