you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
