They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
