remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
i out mim tonsoeep
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
