Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
