god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
