do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize