Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Randomize