I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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