it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
