So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
