you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
