I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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