We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
