whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
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