Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
accomplished twins. life is a go
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
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