why didn't you poke me back
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
