Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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