still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
