what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize