is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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