Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
