I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
