I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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