took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
