We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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