Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I need a beard to bite.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
