Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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