Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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