Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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