how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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