yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Randomize
