Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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