Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
