if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
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