i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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