so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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