So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
