I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
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