oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize