Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
